Y’all she’s here!!! I am so excited to finally blog that our daughter is here! Goodness gracious, we have prayed over this child, and we are so blessed that God answered our prayers through a healthy and beautiful baby girl!!

Our sweet Amelia Kate made her arrival late Tuesday, February 7, 2023, and we have been busy and in love ever since! I was in shock that she came before her due date especially since I had told everyone that she would be so late that I’d have to be induced! I even made plans for her actual due date since I was so convinced she was arriving late. I was wrong!! She came four days early when my water naturally broke on its own! Amelia is a total sweetheart, and we are so blessed that she is almost always happy and very healthy!! We are aware that this isn’t the reality for all babies, and we are just so overjoyed that God has blessed us with good health in little Amelia’s newborn life.

We’ve had many people ask about her name. It doesn’t have any special meaning to us other than Hayden told me he loved that name before we were married. Ever since Hayden mentioned this name, I just knew it’d be our baby girl’s name. We’ve talked about it on and off since, and when we found out we were expecting a girl this last August, I just knew this would be her name. I couldn’t picture any other name. We love how classy “Kate” is, and I love the nickname “Mia Kate.” So we plan to call her both Amelia and Mia Kate. So far, we mostly call her Amelia, and Beckham calls her Mia Kate (and baby sister…since that’s what we referred to her as my entire pregnancy).

The last month has been busy!! Goodness, I can’t believe it’s already been a month. I thought time flew by with Beckham’s first year, but I can tell this is already faster. I guess that’s what happens when you never get a chance to sit down! We are either wrangling a two year old or taking care of a newborn…and a few moments here and there we take a nap sitting straight up. Ahhh, the newborn stage! We can’t complain though, life is so sweet, and we have prayed – and begged – God for this opportunity. While we are looking forward to sleeping through the night again, we can’t begin to fully express how much we love this stage of life with our two littles!

This time around, Hayden and I decided to book a newborn session. I can’t even begin to tell you what a BLESSING this is and was to our family. For Beckham’s newborn photos, I set every photo on a tripod and had my MIL help snap the photos. It was so tedious, and I was so exhausted!! I figured it would be much much harder this time around, and I just didn’t want to miss out on the newborn stage for photos. We had our friend Courtney Longnecker of Courtney Smith Photo capture our family, and we love how the images turned out! The last time we paid someone to take our photos was our wedding (almost 7 years ago), so this was a real treat. It is so fun to have photos of Amelia and Beckham together.

2022 has challenged me like never before. I’m not sure when you’re finding this blog post, but there’s a good chance that if you’re reading this than you’ve had a hard year. Perhaps your year has been met with loads of disappointment, let down, grief, or just not meeting your expectations. Whatever the reason that you’re reading this post, I’m sorry.

If you’ve followed along, you know that we actually started our year off with the worst day of our lives (read the post) when we lost our daughter at 13 weeks. It was challenging to say the least that we were only five days into the new year, and every thing I had envisioned for my year came to an abrupt stop. I am a typical goal planner, and I love planning things weeks and months in advance. However, all of a sudden I was smacked in the face with reality, and I was just trying to make it to the next minute or the next hour without panic.

Of course, the year moved along, and while we did experience many joyful moments and days, but it’s easy for me to look back on this year and label it as a loss in of itself. Here’s where I’m leaning – and I’d love to encourage you.

This may have been a hard year, but there was still good.

It’s easy to write things off, but I know that I still have breath in my lungs and that God still did good in 2022. If you’re reading this – then guess what – God is still using you and that means there is still good!!!

A new year is a fresh start, but we have the freedom to start fresh EVERY DAY.

I won’t lie – I love New Years. Truthfully, I love any celebration, and of course, if it’s a national holiday, I’ve probably tried to see how we can celebrate or decorate. It’s just who I am. So naturally, I’m all about New Year resolutions, planning and preparing, and starting fresh! It feels good – ya know? However, I’ve had to remind myself that there is nothing magical about January 1. I, of course, can allow that to be a launch pad for a great new year, but what happens when troubles come my way next year…do I have to wait until 2024?!! I’ve tried to remind myself a new “year” starts every day! From Dec 1 to Dec 1 or March 13 to March 13. There is nothing magical about January 1, and I can restart every day if I have to. Lamentations 3:22-24 says,

“The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases;

his mercies never come to an end;

23  they are new every morning;

great is your faithfulness.

24  “The LORD is my portion,” says my soul,

“therefore I will hope in him.”

Every day His mercies are new EVERY MORNING. I think we need to give ourselves some grace and mercy EVERY MORNING – remind ourselves that we don’t have to be a prisoner of our past or our hurt. We can have hope that He conquered today, and we don’t have to wait until January 1 for that beauty.

Believe that there is good to come.

As I start a new year, it’s easy for me to think “is this going to be another 2022?!” You know, it very well could be – and I know that. However, I am staying encouraged knowing that this place – Earth – is not my home, and I can have hope that even if I experience a decade of heartache and pain…He is still in control. I pray that I do not have to experience that or be challenged to what I’ve just typed, but I know that there is good to come…even if it’s not in this lifetime.

Here’s a few verses that make me SO excited for what is to come:

“He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.” Revelation 21:4

“But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body, by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself.” Philippians 3:20-21

We can have HOPE! Let’s end this year – no matter what it has brought to us knowing that we’ve been carried through it!!

Well friends, I am so excited to share some photos from a recent mini maternity session. I figured with a toddler and being very pregnant myself it would just be easier on our crew to take photos on two different occasions than to plan an hour long outing – I’m so glad it worked out!

I have taken senior photos in this location, but I’ve been dreaming of having some family photos of our own in this same spot. It was the *perfect* fall evening – and we took all of these in about 15 minutes! The key was keeping expectations low and keeping things moving! I am really into this rust color during the months of Sept-early November. I originally bought this dress from the Glamour Farms Boutique for a September wedding, but in typical midwest weather…it was 95* out! So, I decided to go for something different, and I’ve been not-so-patiently waiting for the perfect moment to wear it! P.S. I actually scored it on MAJOR sale tab clearance. I think it was maybe $11? I’m a big cheerleader for shopping clearance all the time, but especially during pregnancy since my body changes so much!

If you’re outfit planning for your own maternity session, I’d suggest picking out your own outfit first since I knew that I’d probably be the most self-conscious of our crew. Then, I found Hayden’s shirt (thanks to his dad’s closet!) to go along, and I went through Beckham’s closet to see what he already had. You don’t have to spend a lot of money to have matching outfits. If you have a friend group with similar sizes or styles, it’s never a bad idea to just ask around if you can borrow something for a photo.

We are SO beyond excited to meet this little girl, and it is starting to really set in that we are getting close to the end. I am SO grateful to carry this baby each and every day. This pregnancy has been quite a lot more uncomfortable than Beckham’s, but I am grateful for it all…and I mean it!! Every moment and day of discomfort is just a reminder that there is life growing, and I am grateful.

We are getting close to finishing up the nursery – although it won’t be finished until she is here since we’ll have some personalized name things displayed. It’s so fun to have so many pink things!! I was never an all pink girl growing up, but as a girl mom I am like GIVE ME ALL THE PINK. I am so thrilled to meet her and see her sweet face!

P.S. If you want to see our maternity photos from Beckham, here’s a link!

Also, if you shop Glamour Farms Boutique for the first time you can use my code: FKTHREF for 20% off your first order.

Hey friends!! It’s time for another round of family photos, and I love these! I will admit – we picked the HOTTEST time of the day (not ideal), interrupted a 1 yr old’s nap time, and chose the HOTTEST day of Fourth of July Weekend…so we had a lot going against us! Yet, we were still able to get some really cute and fun photos! Here’s hoping next year we can plan for a cooler temp day!

This year’s photos were especially fun because my brother and sister are expecting their first baby – so we had some fun poses to do together!! Hannah is due almost one month before us. It will be such an exciting time for our family in the next year. We are praying daily for good health for everyone!!!

Anyways, we went with a blush and blue color scheme, and it’s so fun! If you know us, we typically stick to blues. Hayden and I both love blue tones for some reason – and so it seems in nearly every family photoshoot we end up in those colors (seriously, IDK how it always happens). Well, this time I’m in pink! It’s fun – and who knows maybe we’ll find out I’m pregnant with a baby girl, and it’ll be a whole foreshadowing thing…but we still don’t know the gender so we’ll have to wait and see!

Enough of my chit-chatting! Here are the photos!

Hi friends, Mother’s Day is almost here, and it’s weird this year. This will be my first mother’s day without our sweet baby Lucy. If you’re reading this post, there’s a chance you too are trying to figure out life without your child here on Earth. If you haven’t read our story, you can here.

First, I’m sorry that you are in this very sad and horrible situation. I’ve realized more than ever that every loss is different. You can’t compare it to one versus another. Also, every person deals and copes with loss differently. I’m grateful that I have a beautiful baby boy on this side of Heaven, but I’m heartbroken that we won’t see our sweet Lucy is this lifetime. Maybe you’re there too…trying to weigh the good found in life with the “I wish it was this way…” thoughts. I’m sorry.

This week, we celebrate Mother’s Day, and as a child I only knew of this day as a happy day. I was blessed with an incredible Mother who led and loved (and still does!) well. It wasn’t until I got much older that I realized Mother’s Day was a challenging, difficult, and down-right awful day for some. This year, it means something a little different to me. For the first time, I will celebrate with a child in Heaven. I anticipated this would’ve been a date with excitement – I would’ve been nearly 8 weeks out from delivering our Lucy, but that’s not our story.

If you’re facing all of these same thoughts too – I’m sorry. I’ve learned over the last 4 months that is the best response. I’m sorry. There are no magical FB or blog posts, no magical gifts, no magical ANYTHING that will fill that void – except the love of Jesus and the hope of Heaven.

Today might be hard for you, and I’m sorry. You have reason to be sad. Let me validate those feelings. It doesn’t matter if you knew your child for a few hours, days, weeks, or months – your feelings are real and validated.

This is my prayer for you:

God, I pray that whoever is reading this right now will feel your peace. Lord, if they have lost a child, I pray that they will find peace in your plan. I pray they will find joy today. God, I know that you know the pain of losing a child. Please help every mom and dad that is experiencing that hurt today. Please Lord, give them an unexplainable sense of peace, love, and joy. Thank you God that we have the opportunity to be reunited with our children in Heaven. Thank you for giving your son so we can all have eternal life. Thank you God for our sweet babies that we had the chance to experience the joy of them for moments, days, and weeks here on Earth. God help us to see the goodness that is still around us. God, you are so so good.

Amen

Cheering for you, mama. You’ve got this.